Why Does Arya Use Scenes?

This article was written for Arya by Karolina Wilde

Karolina Wilde is the author of House of Pain, the first book in a seductive dark fantasy romance trilogy, a journalist, and a sex-positive freelance writer who worked with some of the biggest brands in the world. She has a serious obsession with chocolate (dark or milk, never white, and always with salted caramel), and when she's not writing another book or another client article, she can be found playing World of Warcraft or trying to conquer her never-ending TBR pile.


If you're curious to learn what a BDSM scene is, you've come to the right place! Here at Arya, a Scene is one of the most important parts of the Arya experience. 

It's how you, as a couple, get to tap into your eroticism and explore new things together. So, today we wanted to dive a little deeper into an Arya Scene and uncover the inspiration behind it and why we chose to use the concept of a Scene to build the world of Arya. 

Arya Scene: What Is a BDSM Scene and Where Does Inspiration for a “Scene” Comes From

The Scene: Definition

When creating an Arya experience, we leaned into different sources of inspiration for the Scene – including the BDSM scene and the gay scene. We took elements from these sources and combined them together to create a journey and a place for you to explore and play. 

One of the core things we value is entertainment and finding ways for you to try new things while having fun with your partner. Combining the BDSM and gay scenes allowed us to give couples a dedicated space for fun playtime. 

First, let's talk about what a BDSM scene is. A very basic definition of a BDSM scene is a play session involving two or more people where they engage in consensual powerplay. 

At least one participant in a BDSM scene has to take on the role of a dominant, who leads the scene. And despite the popular belief that BDSM is all about sex, it's not a requirement for a BDSM scene. You might or might not choose to have sex as a part of the scene. 

As for the gay scene, it's a term that is used to describe a social space where you can be safely and openly gay. The social space includes things like gay bars, clubs, events, and much more. It's an inclusive and diverse space, where you can be yourself without judgment. 

Why Arya Embraced The Scene?

Now that we know where the inspiration for the Scene comes from and what the definitions are, let's dig even deeper and discuss how each element plays into the Arya Scene. 

Reframing Eroticism 

The way we're taught to understand sexual desire can be misleading based on how it is shown in most media sources. We think that sex is supposed to just happen and be spontaneous, and if not then it's not romantic enough, or maybe even thought of as boring. 

But that couldn't be further from the truth. All you need is to understand how your desire works and to reframe the way you see eroticism. This is what our aim is here at Arya, and where the Scenes come into play.

“We’re trying to get people to reframe eroticism as something you can tap into. It’s not something that just happens, which is what 99% of people believe around eroticism,” says Nicholas Velotta, the Head of Relationship Science at Arya.

A dedicated time to play with your partner, to try something new within a Scene can become a part of your relationship that gets you excited for some quality time alone. 

“We get stuck in routines and we forget how important signals of erotic energy or intimacy are. And if you can create a ritual or a “Scene” as we’re calling our experience, to foster those things intentionally it can become a part of your routine,” he further explains. 

FYI: Curious to explore taking on different roles in the bedroom? Here are some fun & sexy roleplay ideas just for you.

Permission to Play

Each Scene has a beginning and an end. It's something that's separate from your day-to-day life. This is a moment where you and your partner can leave the real world behind and indulge in some alone quality time. It's your permission to play. 

“It also invites in its name and its inspiration from those sources the idea that you’re able to play. That you’re able to take on a different role, play with roles and dynamics," says Velotta. 

“Because it’s a ritual and it separates itself from everyday life, you’re able to be something outside of your everyday role,” explains Velotta. If in your life or work you're the one who's always in control, a Scene is your opportunity to turn things around and see what it's like when you simply let go. 

Arya gives you permission to play with all of those dynamics and roles in your relationship in an erotic space with no pressure or judgment. 

This division of a Scene creates helps to immerse yourself fully in the experience. All that is needed is for you to think about yourself and your partner in this moment, and the new experience you're going through. The Scene helps shift the focus onto your relationship and your sexuality. 

Safety

Just like with BDSM, safety is the most important part of any erotic play and so a Scene helps to create a dedicated mental (and physical) space for you and your trusted partner to safely explore new things. A Scene gives you that sense of comfort, safety, and security. 

Set Up Users For Success

Lastly, when we were designing our product, we wanted to make sure that we were setting up our users for success. Each of our Scenes is guided by a theme, and using the term "Scene" has helped to frame it into something that's easy to understand and encourages you and your partner to immerse yourself in this experience. 

Our Scenes are outlined to give you inspiration (with our fantasy stories), enough guidance, and skill-building tools to empower you and your partner to try new things while also giving you enough space to play and experiment with the Scene the way you two desire. 


It’s your time to play.

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About Arya

Life is so grown up and you two deserve some play time. Insert your new bestie Arya — a monthly subscription to reignite the spark, try new sexual experiences, and grow closer with your partner. Don't hold back your fantasies! You'll get access to a personal relationship concierge, expertly guided activities tailored to your deepest desires and a curated box of goodies delivered discreetly to your door.

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